I offer this little innocent writing of mine
along with my humble salutations and love at His divine Lotus feet in
order to transform myself into divine being and spread His message of Love
to the world with His grace. Trusting Him with no trace of doubt is the
only boon of my life.
My Lord! I now understood the process of moving from darkness to Light;
changing from immorality to Immortality; shedding untruth only to lead to
Truth. A heart when filled with the perfume of transformation, experiences
the great feeling of reaching the peak of the mountain. I now have the
same feeling of achieving my life’s goal in the process of making my life
worthy at your Lotus feet. Let your feet crush my ego; let your heart
soften my rock-strewn heart and let your words transform my mind. I am a
little instrument in your hand of Divinity spreading your love to the
world.
OM SAI RAM
Knowing who Sathya Sai Baba is but not realizing He is God, proves one has
not yet stepped on to the path of Ultimate spiritual Goal of Universal
Divine Love. Narrating experiences of Sai which lead this little life on
to the path of reality and spirituality are all that this effort is about.
These episodes relate the transformation from the stage of a ‘Non
believer’ to a stage of ‘Blind, unwavering Faith.’
I took it as a challenge not out of devotion but out of a feeling that I
should not lose and that I should acquire a seat in that college as said
by my brother-in-law. I immediately asked Baba to give me a seat if I
needed to believe him as the incarnation of God. I filled in and sent the
application to Prashantinilayam, Puttaparthi.
After a few days, I received a Call letter from the institute stating that
I should attend the entrance exam (admission test) on a particular date. I
felt little relieved as I felt half the job was done. As if not to let me
in peace for long, my intermediate exams were postponed due to some
political issues in Andhra Pradesh. The dates of my intermediate exams and
that of the admission test were clashing as if it was all pre-planned. I
was so upset and so mailed a letter to the authorities in Prashanthi
Nilayam informing them the above situation. But I surely lost all my
hopes. I again received a letter from Prashantinilayam stating that the
admission test was also postponed due to the above reason and that I could
attend the test which was rescheduled. I was overjoyed as my +2 exams
would be finished by then.
The day of my entrance exam was approaching and my intensified prayers to
Baba were rising to the peak thus-
“Baba, if you are really God, you will know how much I yearn for a seat in
your Institute. If you are all knowing, you will make it happen. I don’t
know how you are going to make it, but please do it. If I don’t get a seat
there, it means I need not believe you to be all knowing.”
I prepared for the entrance exam not having
sufficient time for preparation after completion of my +2 exams. The
precious day had arrived leading me to the divine land of Puttaparthy
which I didn’t then realize. I went to Puttaparthi for the first time in
my life with my brother Ramesh and sister-in-law. Baba wasn’t there. He
was in Brindavan(Bangalore). The night just before the admission test, I
happened to know that the question pattern I was preparing was quite
different from the actual pattern. I met one of the students in the motel
I was staying who was also attending the same entrance exam. I was
perplexed, ashamed and didn’t know what to do.
I had absolutely no time to give a new start of preparation at that hour
of previous night. That night, I slept without sleep; I was dumb without
any peace or stillness at heart. The Sun arose as if it was threatening me
to face the consequences. I had nothing to do except to pray to Baba to
give His blessings before I gave the test. I stepped out of my motel and
then came across a small boy with some pictures in hand. He was actually
selling them and he came right in front of me. I suddenly stopped and the
picture he showed me to sell was one of Baba’s pictures. The top most
picture was Baba’s blessing picture and the bottom lines read thus-
“WHY FEAR WHEN I AM HERE?”
I was thrilled and overjoyed that a first drop of tear of joy for Baba ran
down my cheek. I felt Baba was in fact blessing me. Assuming it to be a
good omen, I started off for the entrance test with lots of confidence at
heart though not at mind. The test was conducted at Baba’s Primary school.
It was a divine environment which I never imagined it to be. It was as if
I was stepping on to the land of an ancient Ashram.
As I imagined it to be, the question pattern was completely different and
somehow I managed to complete my exam. I did well in all the chosen
subjects except one of the papers. The Interview for the students who
succeeded in the entrance exam was conducted the next day and I was the
last victim to become THE focus in the interview room.
That was my first ever interview in my life and I was really tensed when I
went in. There were so many people against my imagination. They were
really cool and didn’t let me off the place any time though they had that
necessity. I prepared well for the interview, especially updated myself
with the political side. When I was asked who the President of India was,
it was then I realized my mind just went blank with no answer for a well
prepared and the most common sense question. I was ashamed but not them.
They asked me many more as I was the last one to be interviewed and I
could answer all the questions to my heart’s content and theirs too but I
had the guilt of not answering the foremost question. They were also
shocked as to why the answer didn’t strike me while the answer for the
then current Election commissioner struck me so well. I was even asked as
to why I wanted to join in that Institute and one of my answers was
student-teacher relationship being good. They gave me a pleasant smile and
asked me to wait for the results.
I was so eager that I couldn’t wait any longer till I got my results. I
was going on begging Baba not to disappoint me but rather bless me with a
seat. The night before my result was announced, I for the first time
dreamt of Baba where he was overtaking me in His red car. I didn’t know
what it meant but I took it as His blessing. May be it meant he overtook
my doubts, suspicions, my negativity and knowledge. I woke up in the
morning and my heart was filled with a ‘never felt before feeling’ which
was very divine. My brother kept teasing me for fun from the day of my
interview saying, “come on, pack your things, we can go home” meaning I
wouldn’t get seat there as I couldn’t answer such an easy and common sense
question. I had my breakfast and came out where in I found a big crowd at
the wall of the canteen looking for their results.
I realized my fate was hung at the wall and I was tensed and anxious to
check out mine. I was there at last eagerly staring at the board. That
very moment changed my whole life. I was really amazed to see my name and
number on the result page. I was overjoyed and let me tell you, I was not
shouting like we do in normal excited situations. When the heart is full,
the tongue gets tightened. So was I. I was literally in tears of joy and
success and thanked Baba for proving His divinity to this little ignorant
creature. With thankfulness, excitement and tears of joy, I was walking
forward and my brother was coming in the opposite direction after his
break-fast. Seeing tears in my eyes he thought his joke proved to be a
reality. He was worried a bit and asked,
“didn’t you get a seat?”
I then answered in the affirmative and I let all of my tears easily roll
down with no breaks. I packed my luggage. I didn’t know we had to wear
saris and so went to Puttaparthi unprepared. So I had to buy Saris
immediately as they (Indian traditional outfit ) were to be worn by the
college girl students of Anantapur campus. We did shop a little and
started off in a bus to Anantapur where the ‘Sathya Sai Institute of
Higher Learning’ for women was located and which was approximately 3 hours
away from Puttaparthi.
My next episode on 'My journey to Anatapur'
Thanks a lot
As Ms. vinni s.reddy- one of the members of Telugupeople.com requested me
to quote my experiences as Sathya Sai's student, today on this precious
day being Bhagawan's birthday, I started off on my sojourn of narrating my
life as a Sai student in this
website. I hope readers will have a positive heart and mind to accept this
humble
offering of mine. I offer my humble salutations at the divine feet of my
Lord Sri Sathya
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